Last Night I went to see Conan O’Brien at Austin Music Hall. It should furthermore be understood that I am deeply and increasingly in love with Conan O’Brien. Admittedly, I say the same things about Tony Romo and Ryan Gosling, but with Conan its different. I actually believe in my heart that, if he didn’t have a wife and children, and if I could only corner all 6 foot 7 of him in an elevator somewhere, that we could start a life together and never look back on the days before we had each other. Perhaps these and similar imaginings contributed in some mysterious way to me attending this show unaccompanied. We can never know for certain.
As I tried to find my place in the longest line of people I have ever seen in my life, I kept an eye out for any single, glasses -wearing men demonstrating subtle but intentional ties to the Christian faith (a Jesus-Fish ring or a tattooed Bible reference perhaps). You see, I might have gently suggested to God that meeting my husband at a Conan O’Brien Show could really make up for years of confusing singledom. Not that I was in any way scoffing at his sovereign plan for my life or anything -- just trying to be useful really--help the big guy see things from a fresh angle ‘cause it sort of seems like he’s been a bit stuck in a rut when it comes to my dating experiences lately (sigh).
As fate would have it, there was a cute guy right behind me in line but I could not completely convince myself that the lovely girl he was with was his cousin, especially after he put his hand in her back pocket. However, behind the cousin couple was another cute guy. But, as it turns out it is sort of awkward to start a conversation with a complete stranger who is 3 people down from you in a line of other complete strangers. So, I could only assume that my divine “hottie” provision would come along inside.
Just before I entered the building,however, I heard a familiar voice yell out my name. A voice I couldn’t quite place but whose loveliness was undeniable. I turned, hopeful that it was one of my Austin crushes, thrilled to see me and hoping to grab coffee afterward. But when my eyes scoured the crowd to match the sounds with a sight, I saw that it was not a hunky crush at all. It was my hunky college boyfriend Edward Norton with his beautiful post-college wife. They had tickets on the floor, mere sweat droplets away from Conan. "Great," I thought, as they headed hand in hand to their superior seats. I gotta find out what kind of prayer beads that guy uses.
Stay tuned for Part 2 which may or may not include the details of my make-out session with one red-haired CoCo Puff.
6 comments:
I heart K.K.! Can't wait for Episode 2!
Kerri, it's good to find you out here in cyber world. I, too, am a huge Conan fan, although I like to refer to him by the name given him by Snoop Dogg, "Coco Loc". I'm really looking forward to following you, not in a stalker way, just the friendly blog way.
I am SO glad you started a blog! Great first posts... can't wait to read part two... I may just have to call you to get the rest of the story.
Oh, about that Bethany, I am not taking calls anymore...any and all info about me is going to have to come from this weekly, crafted and publicized medium.
Paul, is this perchance because that nick-name reminds you of the weekly COMBO LOCO at your neighborhood H.E.B.? Man, I love combo locos. Thanks for following!
For a minute I thought you were crushing on the other Gosling dude... what's his name? Something and Kate Plus Eight. I was worried. But good ole google, I'll sign off on Ryan.
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